According to this article, POTUS has signed an executive order creating a task force that will look into "potential risks from price fixing and anti-competitive behavior."
An unnamed source reported that "we don't plan to change any of this price fixing or monopolistic behavior. We are only studying it so we know the risks when we fix prices, and so that we can continue to reward hard-working CEOs with maximum profit and minimum accountability."
In completely unrelated news, the CEOs of Tyson Foods, Cargill, Hormel and several other food companies are rumored to be preparing documents seeking pardons. An anonymous source has quoted multiple CEOs as saying "it's early in the negotiations, but we could see the government or Trump personally being awarded a few golden shares of our company." One mentioned free chicken nuggets for life. "It's a small price to pay," the CEO was reported to say. After all, he's in is late 70's and he lives on junk food. How much longer can he have?"
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