Sometimes My Ex Still Amazes Me

... and not in a good way. Just when I've adjusted to her stupid shit, she pulls another idiotic stunt, and I'm stunned all over again.

When we split up, we decided that we'd alternate taking care of the kids' birthday parties. On odd years, I would throw the older kid's party and she'd do the younger one's celebration. On even years, we'd switch. I'm still uneasy doing these parties, if only because she's there, but hey, it's not about me... it's about the kids.

Last weekend we threw the younger kid's party. It's the ex's turn to take care of the older one... and it's a biggie, because the big 'un is turning sweet 16. Last month, my daughter and the ex started talking about the sweet 16 party, and my kid was understandably excited about the milestone birthday.

Fast forward to a couple of days ago. My wife and I found out -- from the kid -- that there would be no sweet 16 party. Apparently, the ex is once again strapped for money and she told the kid that there would be no party as a result.

In order to understand the full implications of this, I should recap...

Roughly a year ago, the ex was pulled over for driving a car with an expired registration. During this stop, the cop discovered that she not only had an expired registration, but she stole the registration sticker from another car (but wasn't smart enough to steal another one when that sticker expired), that she had no insurance, that she was driving with a suspended license, and that there was a warrant out for her arrest.

Her car was impounded as a result of this arrest. She was unable to pay to get it out of impound, so it was sold at a police auction, and she got some heavy fines which she also didn't pay.

A month or two later, she was evicted from her apartment for not paying her rent, and she moved in with some friends. The friends live in a teeny little house built in the 1930's and have two kids of their own. The ex lives in a single room and when the kids stay with her, all three of them are in a single room about the size of your average bedroom.

Because of the living arrangements, my wife and I asked to keep the kids more often. After all, when they're with the ex, they're all three stuck in a single small room. When they're here, they've got their own space, they can still catch the bus to school in the mornings, they've got ready access to their friends, and so forth. In a moment of sanity, the ex agreed to our request. This agreement was all under the table, so there was no change in child support. Yes, my wife and I are the full-time parents, the ex is a weekend mom, and I'm still paying child support for this privilege.

So, to sum it up... the ex has no car payment, no car insurance to buy, no gas to buy, less food to buy, and no rent because she's staying with the friends rent-free, and there's no reduction in her income. She should have more money than she know how to spend.

A couple of months back, she got her license back. This is not because she paid off her fines, but because she petitioned the court, and was approved for a repayment plan. She got a car, but it was given to her. She's now paying for gas, but there's still no car payment, and still no rent. She should still be bring in more money than she has to spend.

She's known about our daughter's sweet 16 for -- well, for 16 years! She's had about ten months to squirrel a little bit away each month for the party. Hell, she should have known approximately how much the party would cost when they made the initial plans for the party. But now, less than a month away from her sweet 16, mom has told our daughter that there will be no party. My wife found out about this two days ago. I talked about it to the kid last night.

I told her that I didn't think she should have to give up her sweet 16 because of her mom. I said that I'd take care of it.

Yep... sometimes my ex still amazes me with her stupid shit. But what surprises me more is the fact that I'm still shocked at the stupid shit my ex pulls.

Reevaluating

I had hoped this election would be different. I somehow knew that in the end it would be more of the same by both candidates... distortions, half-truths and mud-slinging... but I hoped things would be different this time. For a while I was right.

Like most people, I despise where we've gone as a country under George W. Bush's watch. Unlike most, I saw early on, so I've been angry for longer than most Americans. I supported McCain in 2000, and when I witnessed the Republican choices for the 2008 election, I said the only way I'd vote Republican was if he was the Republican choice. I got my wish. Sort of.

When McCain became the nominee, I was no longer automatically drawn to the Democrats. After all, McCain seemed honest, honorable and above the mud-slinging that's so common in politics. That's all changed. McCain has fallen to the level of politicking that has consistently disgusted me by telling half-truths.

It seems that Obama is staying above the fray, and that's bringing me to once again re-evaluate my decision. Maybe I'll end up voting for none of the above.

Nothing New

As you may have noticed, I haven't written much lately. This is partly because I've been moving my old stuff to my new site. Not only is this process time-consuming, but it also tends to sap me of ideas. Every time I think about writing something, I remember an old post that I recently moved and can't help but think "Man, I already wrote about that."

In addition to that, I've been more focused on just living and enjoying my life, rather than commenting on my observations. I haven't given up on blogging, I'm just in a writing rut.