Time Marches On...

Today is going to be another rambling post... I'm going to write without proof-reading...

Yesterday marks the one month anniversary since my best friend took his own life.  Time is marching on, and time seems a surreal way to mark the event.  It seems like yesterday that he did it, and it seems like an eternity since I've seen him.  Part of me feels like time should stop so that I can come to grips with things, but I know that's not possible, so another piece of me wishes that time would fast forward to the point where I've come to grips with what's happened.  But I also know that if time were to fast forward, I'd miss out on all kinds of good things that would happen along the way, so I mostly wish for time to stop while I process shit.

I know that my last several blog posts have focused on Greg's suicide.  I know it's depressing as shit.  I'm sorry for that.  For those of you who read my shit regularly... well, psyche... I don't write regularly any more, but you know what I mean... anyway, please know that I'm sad but not depressed.  I miss Greg, but I'm at least trying to enjoy life.  I think of him every day, but am to the point where I remember the good shit.

I've been going over to his house a lot... to make sure that his wife and kids are okay... and to feel close to him.  His wife and I share memories, and we tell a lot of jokes at his expense.  It's only fair... the fucker's not going to get the last word.  We both miss him terribly.