In Defense of Ralph Northam

I suspect I'm going to get some heat over this post, but I've never been one to shy away from a discussion just because it's uncomfortable.  Let me start by saying I understand that wearing blackface is socially unacceptable by today's standards.  I will also state I haven't always understood that wearing blackface is wrong.  I don't recall ever wearing blackface when I was younger... but I certainly would have.  If I had dressed up like a black person though, it definitely wouldn't have done been done with the goal of offending anyone.  You see, this is something that the PC crowd is completely missing... intent.

People who are upset by Ralpy Northam's blackface need to step back and consider the motivation behind the behavior.  In order to do that you need to bear in mind this picture was taken almost forty years ago.  Times were different then, and Northam was most surely a different person.  Things that may seem abhorrent today were perfectly acceptable back then.  Please stop applying today's values to yesterday's behavior; it's not reasonable.  Judging yesterday's behavior with today's morals is kind of like lowering the speed limit, and retroactively ticketing anyone who has ever exceeded the new lower speed limit.

Like I said, things were different forty years ago.  It's quite possible that blacks didn't find blackface offensive back then.  More likely, blacks didn't like the idea, but Northam didn't know it was offensive.  If that's the case (and I personally think this is the most likely scenario,) then you're punishing him for ignorance.  Again, that's not reasonable.  Another realistic possibility is that he knew it was in poor taste, but didn't realize the extent it bothered -- bothers -- the black community.  If that's what happened, let me ask you to look in the mirror.  If any among you are without sin in this area, then feel free to cast the first stone.  Otherwise, remove the plank from your own eye before complaining about the splinter in another man's eye.

Let me get a bit more personal here.  I said earlier that I don't recall ever wearing black face.  I do, however, very distinctly recall a close friend doing so.  He's a straight white guy, and he dressed like a black pimp one year for Halloween.  He took third place in the Halloween contest.  Only when he accepted his prize did anyone find out that he's white.  Nobody was pissed.  In fact, they thought it was an awesome costume and said that he'd have taken first place if they'd have known he was white.  This guy didn't set out to offend anyone.  He was and still is one of the best men I know.  I personally have dressed in drag for Halloween, and for the Navy's Crossing of the Equator Ceremony when I was in the Marine Corps.  In neither instance did I wear women's clothing with the intent of mocking women or the LGBTQ community.

It's also unreasonable to condemn Northam outright, because people change.  I've said it before, and I'll say it again... I'm not the same guy I was when I was 20.  When I was a child, I was prejudiced against blacks.  I grew up in Southern Kansas, and learned this bigotry from my classmates.  When I moved to Iowa, in the late 70's, I made black friends and started learning that skin color isn't important.  I was also biased against homosexuals.  It took a bit longer to outgrow that one, but again, I eventually learned that sexual preference has little impact on a person's character.  I have done what I could to apologize to those I may have wronged as a result of the distorted views of my youth, and I hope that people will judge me based on who I am today, not who I was back then.

On that same thought train... when I was in high school, I didn't have much time for the jocks... the preppies... the cheerleaders... you know the stereotypically pretentious ones.  I skipped the first couple of high school reunions, because I assumed they were still the same jackasses they were before we graduated.  Eventually, I went; and I discovered that, for the most part, they had changed as well.  A few of us exchanged apologies for crappy past behavior.  I still don't see eye to eye with some of these folks, but I have learned that they're not assholes just because we don't agree.  Overwhelmingly, they are good people just trying to get by.  We may not be friends... but we want the same things... for our children to do better than we did.  We seek prosperity, health, love and security.

And this is what I'm coming to... okay, Ralph Northam dressed in blackface.  Okay, by today's standards that's unacceptable behavior.  But remember this... he probably didn't go out with the goal of wronging or oppressing anyone when he put on the blackface.  Even if he did though, remember, this was over half of a lifetime ago for him.  Before you excoriate him, at least take a look at what he's done since then.  Maybe, just maybe, he deserves a break.