Sometimes, it's not too Late. Other Times, it Is.

I'm sitting in hospice right now, watching my uncle "resting comfortably." It's apparent to me that he's having difficulty breathing, and I know that any breath could be his last. From what I've been told, he's got "everything." His heart is failing... they say it's operating at about 5% efficiency. His kidneys are failing. And they suspect that he has late-stage cancer, but there's no sense in opening him up to find out.

This is going to be a flashback post. I'm going to rewind God-Only-Knows how far. I guess that I should start in my childhood. On both sides of my family, we've been what you could conservatively call loose-knit. My parents live two hours away, and I see them a couple of times per year. My brothers each live four hours from me. One brother I see once or twice per year, and the other I haven's seen in about five years. I haven't seen most of my aunts, uncles and cousins in about a decade.

I know that there's no excuse for this. But I also guess that we're all happy with the way things are. We're all involved enough in our own lives that nobody is willing to call us all together. Another thing we've got going against us is that a lot of us hold grudges. My dad and my uncle (the one I'm watching now) didn't speak to one-another for years. They finally buried the hatchet over the last couple of days, before my uncle's condition deteriorated to where it is now.

I too haven't seen my uncle for I-don't-know-how-long. This had nothing to do with the dad-uncle feud. In my case, it's because I didn't make enough effort to visit an uncle who never left the house.

During my two-hour drive, I wondered a lot of things... Would I make it? What would I say? Would he be coherent enough for us to have a conversation? Would he be angry with me for waiting so long? Was I going for him? For me? For my dad? None of it really mattered. We're all family, and my place was in the hospice room.

My aunt and one of my cousins were here. I kept thinking what I'd be saying if I were in the bed instead of my uncle. "Well, geez, if I knew that it was this easy to get the family together, I'd have done it years ago."

The catching up is mostly done. Now it's just my uncle, my dad and me. My uncle is still sleeping peacefully. I am writing in bits and pieces... in between my dad and I telling stories.

I stepped out a while ago and grabbed a burger. I figured that while I was out, I'd look up Lisa, and old friend of mine. I've known Lisa for over fifteen years. I talked to her a lot when I was going through my divorce. I suspect that was a bit tough for her, because she stayed friends with the ex too. Anyway, when I started dating again, Lisa and my now-wife had a disagreement, which caused a fall out between Lisa and me.

A few months back, Lisa called. We caught up. I thought things were good. Fast-forward back to tonight. I figured I'd call and or drop by while I'm in town. She hung up on me. I'm not sure what I did, but that's not important.

Sometimes, it's not too late. Other times, it is.