Thursday, April 2, 2009

Sorry, He's not a Victim. He's a Fat Bastard

Today's post started with Paulius. Last Friday, he started a rant, which brought a comment from Kelly, which brought about another Paulius rant, and another Kelly comment. Now I've got enough fodder for my own complete post. Please bear in mind though, I never saw the original Oprah interview that Paulius is talking about, so I may be speaking a bit out of turn. This doesn't negate my overall opinion though.

Sorry Kelly. I agree with Paul. I think that one of the largest problems with American society is that we lack any sense of personal responsibility... we're all victims, and everything negative that happens to us is somebody else's fault.

Your comments on both of Paul's articles underscore my point. I will happily concede that mom contributes to fat bastard's problem, but at some point he's got to take responsibility for his own actions.

Saying that he doesn't know any better is a fallacy, because the media, schools and the government all spend countless dollars and hours preaching the benefits of a healthy diet... even going to the extent of recommending a general daily caloric intake (2000 calories) and the number of servings of specific types of foods for a healthy diet. I find it difficult to believe that this kid's never heard of or seen the food pyramid.

Again, I'm not absolving mom of her part in this... obviously any mother that would feed her kid ten fried chickens per day deserves to have her parental rights revoked. But I'll bet this kid thinks he's ready to drive a car. How can you be responsible enough to drive a car, but not be responsible enough to eat sensibly?

And since the double-standard was brought up, let's compare this to smoking. I started smoking when I was 17 years old. I've smoked off and on (mostly on) for over 20 years. I've quit so many times that I've lost count. I was raised with the knowledge that smoking is unhealthy, but I made a personal choice to try tobacco... and I got hooked. I knew the risk. I took the chance, and I will pay the price for the rest of my life. Assuming I'm lucky and my willpower is strong, my most recent quit will stick, and the only price I'll pay is that I'll have nicotine cravings for the rest of my life. If I'm not lucky strong enough, I'll fall back into my tobacco habit and I will actually purchase the carcinogen that gives me cancer, providing me with a slow, agonizing death.

That's right. I am an addict. If you follow the twelve-step mentality, I am a recovering tobacco addict... blah, blah, blah. Backing up to your "double standard" though. Yeah, people revile fat people and make jokes. Nobody's trying to outlaw being fat though. If you think that being fat is frowned upon, try being a smoker! I can't think of a more scorned group of people than smokers.

"Why don't you just quit?" Ummm... non-smokers don't get it. The addictive properties of tobacco are so strong that asking someone to "just quit" is like asking someone to "just not drink water." Yes. It's that powerful. Going back to my original point though... I made a choice to start smoking. And each successive cigar or cigarette that I smoke (or don't smoke) is a personal choice. Just like fat bastard's decision to stuff another chicken in his tubby little face is his decision. Yeah, mom may make the chicken, but ultimately, it's the kid's hands picking up the chicken. It's the kid's teeth chewing the food, and it's the kid's throat swallowing the shit.

It's easy to call overeating a disorder and think of the kid as a victim. It's also easy to say I'm addicted to tobacco, give up and smoke until I die. At some point though, personal responsibility and accountability has to kick in. If the kid's never held accountable, then we as a society are doing him a greater disservice than his enabling mother.

5 comments:

Kelly said...

I am not saying that he couldn't choose not to eat the things he does - any more than an anorexic couldn't 'choose' to start eating again. BUT, if he has an eating disorder, propogated by his mother feeding him endless fried chickens,then when he needs is to be helped, not reviled.

With the proper treatment (and I don't mean just stomach stapling) he can overcome his issues.

You compare overeating to smoking - well, as someonewho is both overweight and a smoker/non smoker I can tell you. I find it much easier toquit smoking than I do to diet. Given the coice between no more cigarettes and no more chocolate for the rest of my life. Well, bye bye cigarettes.

Everyone has their own addiction. His is food. I think we're going to have to agre to disagree on this one.

Alcoholics, and drug addicts get the 12 step program.....why not overeaters?

Paulius said...

"Alcoholics, and drug addicts get the 12 step program.....why not overeaters?"

Sorry, had to chime in here...It's because overeaters aren't having to give up eating.

If you're giving up crack, that means no crack again ever. If you're an over-eater, it means changing habits and eating less.

I actually worked it out. If this kid had done something as easy as eat ten grilled chickens every day instead of ten fried chickens, that would remove almost 5000 calories a day from his diet...and he could still eat fried chicken, just not in massive amounts.

Again, that's my point. He saw himself as the victim of a disease and refused to even take that step.

Sunny said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sunny said...

I think we all have our own personal demons and have to take responsibility for exorcising them in whatever way we have to.

It's OUR lives, we need to take charge of it.
Period.

I wish I could go thru the 12 step program for overeating...it would definitely work and make dieting and staying slim easy if we never had to deal with food again...but it wouldn't be a LONG happy life after it, for sure.

(I deleted this same comment above because it had too many misspelled words...I HATE that!!!)

Sunny said...

You're a Winner!!!
See My blog to see why!!!

Hugz!
Sunny