Cultivating the Nesting Instinct

The Mrs. and I have been cultivating our nesting instinct, which makes me incredibly happy.

You see, the house we live in was really my ex-wife's dream house. When the ex and I moved in, the ex had a lot of plans for the place, but she never really finished any of them. When we split up, I got the house and its numerous unfinished projects. I spent the first year after our split-up doing virtually nothing on the house. Partially because I was getting used to my new situation, and partially because I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with the place. Over time, I started formulating my own vision for the house, and began implementing changes accordingly. A little paint here, a few decorations there, but nothing major.

Then I met the woman who would become my wife, and we moved in together. Again I was faced with a dilemma. Though a mental image for the house was forming in my mind, I put these ideas on hold. Once we decided to move in together (and subsequently get married) it ceased being "my place," and became "our place." Part of the irony of this is the fact that "our dreams" entailed mopping up some of the shit that my ex-wife had started and not finished. I'm going to use this picture as an example.

When we moved in to the house, the area that's now covered in cedar bark and a few plants was originally covered with red lava rock and some perennial plants. The ex hated the lava rock, so she formulated a plan, ripped the lava rock out, and it remained that way for the next several years. During this time, the area became overgrown with grass and weeds and generally looked like shit. I always thought of it as an eyesore, but never tackled it because I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with it.

My vision finally began to develop this spring, thanks in large part to my wife's ideas and input. We decided that it would keep its basic original shape and aspect, but reconstructed in our image. I started by keeping the only two original plants to survive, and re-bordering the rest with short picket fencing, then covering the remainder in cedar chips. Once that was done, we waited for a bit, allowed a loose idea to form, and then headed to Menard's for the rest of the plants.

I won't bore you with the minute details, but we shopped, found stuff we both liked, brought it home, and spent a couple of hours bonding with mother earth as we cultivated our nesting instinct. The result, as seen in this picture, is the immediate result of a vision that we shared. It's something that provided us immediate gratification, and will undoubtedly grow and evolve as we do.