Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Playin' MY Game

Crazy Ex Wife called me last night ranting about how I'm undermining her authority. She came to this irrational conclusion based on two incidents...

-A couple of weeks ago, the little kid had her school conference. The kid started talking about what she'd been doing in school, and I asked her to wait until the Mrs. arrived to start talking about school. Crazy Ex Wife somehow determined that I had undermined her authority.

-Big Kid wants to go to a concert. I said that I'd take her, but that she needs to pay for her own ticket. Night before last, she said that her mom agreed to pay for her ticket, and Big Kid suggested that I pay for the ticket and have her mom pay me back. I declined. When the kid asked me why, I simply said that her mom isn't good about paying me back. Crazy Ex Wife somehow determined that I had undermined her authority.

Next thing I knew, Crazy Ex Wife had called to bitch at me about this; I tried to calmly discuss things but quickly realized that the bitch wasn't being rational and that a discussion was out of the question. I hung up on her.

She called back. I answered the phone by asking if she was ready to discuss, or if she was going to continue ranting. In short order, I told her that I was going to hang up and told her not to call back.

She called again, and I didn't pick up. She left a message, and I deleted it without listening to what she had to say.

She pushed my buttons and pissed me off, but I refused to play her game. I could have gotten into a shouting match with her. I could have yelled, screamed, told her that she's undermining herself just fine without my help, and pointed out all of the ways she's not doing what's best for the kids. But I'm not going to play her game.

You see, her game is drawing me into the eternal drama that is her so-called life. Her game is all about looking good in the moment. Her game is all about appearances. My game is about no longer allowing myself to be drawn into her little issues. My game is about doing what's right -- for the kids, the Mrs. and myself -- in the long haul. My game is all about substance. I'm not going to play her game. I'm playing my game.

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