"My Friends Said We Wouldn't Get Caught"

President Bush was unaware of the pending sale of shipping operations at six major U.S. seaports to a state-owned business in the United Arab Emirates until the deal already had been approved by his administration, the White House said Wednesday.

Defending the deal anew, the administration also said that it should have briefed Congress sooner about the transaction. "That way, Congress could have received some of the graft that the White House received," an anonymous White House staffer stated, following up with "Oops, did I say that out loud? Oh well, I guess the cat's out of the bag."

Bush on Tuesday brushed aside objections by leaders in the Senate and House that the $6.8 billion sale could raise risks of terrorism at American ports. In a forceful defense of his administration's earlier approval of the deal, the President pledged to veto any bill Congress might approve to block the agreement involving the sale of a British company to the Arab firm. "I don't care if the Arabs do blow up the ports, this deal will make me and my cronies a lot of money after I'm out of the White House."

Dubai Port's top American executive (loosely translated as bribery-guy), chief operating officer Edward H. Bilkey, said the company will do whatever the administration asks to ensure the sale goes through. Bilkey said Wednesday he will work in Washington to persuade skeptical lawmakers they should endorse the deal. "Oh yeah, we'll do whatever we have to.... trips to Aruba, political contributions, new houses for distant relatives," Bilkey told The Associated Press in an interview. "We're going to do our best to persuade them that they jumped the gun. The UAE is a very solid friend, as President Bush has said. And by 'friend,' I mean someone that will line their pockets with lots and lots of dough."

Bush faces a rebellion from leaders of his own party, as well as from Democrats, about the deal that would put Dubai Ports in charge of major shipping operations in New York, New Jersey, Baltimore, New Orleans, Miami and Philadelphia. The main challenge stems from the fact that the White House got lots of bribes, without Congress getting in on the action.

While Bush has adamantly defended the deal, the White House acknowledged that he did not know about it until recently. "He became aware of it over the last several days. He was really pissed that he didn't get in on the action earlier," McClellan said. Asked if Bush did not know about it until it was a done deal, McClellan said, "That's correct." He said the bribes did not immediately rise to the presidential level, but went through a congressionally-mandated process. "The president made sure to check with all the Cabinet secretaries that are part of this process, or whose agencies or departments are part of this process," the spokesman said. "He asked Vice President Cheney. The Vice-President paused for an unusually long time and said, 'Ummmm, yeah, I guess so.' And every one of the Cabinet secretaries expressed that they were comfortable with the money they were getting as a result of this transaction being approved," he said.

Commerce Secretary Carlos Gutierrez, told the AP in an interview: "Look, the Arabs are not in charge of security. We are not going to let them blow our shit up. We're just taking a little coin on the side in return for turning our heads when they smuggle tobacco, porn, booze and stuff like that from the U.S. to the Middle East. Everybody wins."

Treasury Secretary John Snow said failure to complete the transaction would send the wrong message overseas. "The implications of failing to approve this would be to tell the world that bribes in the United States from certain parts of the world aren't welcome," Snow told reporters Wednesday following a speech in Connecticut to a fuel cell manufacturer. "That sends a terrible message."

The sale's harshest critics were not appeased. "I will fight harder than ever for this legislation, and if it is vetoed I will fight as hard as I can to override it," said Rep. Pete King, R-N.Y., chairman of the Homeland Security Committee. "If they'd have let me in on the coin earlier on, I'd have kept my mouth shut. But the White House's action is telling me that I'm not worth bribing. King and Democratic Sen. Charles Schumer of New York said they will introduce emergency legislation to suspend the ports deal.

McClellan dismissed any connection between the deal and David Sanborn of Virginia, a former senior DP World executive whom the White House appointed last month to be the new administrator of the Maritime Administration of the Transportation Department. Sanborn worked as DP World's director of operations for Europe and Latin America. "My understanding is that he has assured us that he was not involved in the negotiations to purchase this British company," McClellan added. "He even said 'Cross my heart and hope to die.' I'll take his word, because I couldn't see whether or not he had his fingers crossed behind his back." Of course nobody with half a brain believed what McClellan said.

Earlier, several lawmakers determined to capsize the pending sale said they would not be deterred by Bush's veto threat. (A reporter said 'capsize.' Lawmakers aren't witty enough to come up with such a cool play on words.) Sen. Joseph Biden, D-Del., said the bipartisan opposition to the deal indicated "a lack of confidence in the administration" on both sides. "Sure, we have to link up with our Arab friends but ... we want to see that those in Congress get in on some of the action too," Biden said on ABC's "Good Morning America."

Bush's veto threat sought to quiet a political storm that has united Republican governors and Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist of Tennessee with liberal Democrats, including New York Sens. Hillary Rodham Clinton and Schumer. But it didn't work, it only pissed them off more.

To assuage concerns, the administration shared a token amount of the money it 'negotiated' with Dubai Ports. The administration also said that they're requiring Dubai to participate in U.S. security programs to stop *cough* *incoming* *cough* smuggling and detect illegal shipments of nuclear materials. "We had to do something to make it look like it's not about lining our pockets," an anonymous bribe-taker admitted.

Frist said Tuesday, before Bush's comments, that he would introduce legislation to put the sale on hold if the White House did not "share the wealth" with Congress. He said the deal raised "serious questions regarding the integrity of our congressional bribery system."

House Speaker Dennis Hastert, R-Ill., asked the president for a moratorium on the sale until he could open a Swiss bank account.

Lawmakers from both parties have noted that some of the Sept. 11 hijackers used the United Arab Emirates as an operational and financial base. In addition, critics contend the UAE was an important transfer point for shipments of smuggled nuclear components sent to Iran, North Korea and Libya by a Pakistani scientist. "That doesn't matter," the White House retorted. "The average taxpayer can't even IMAGINE the amount of money that we're -- and I mean us personally, not the United States -- making off of this deal."