Saturday, July 20, 2013

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part XII

Epilogue
This may sound like the end of the story, but it’s just the beginning.  My daughter is racking up several thousand dollars in medical bills.  She can’t work.  She may have to drop out of school, and will be unable to recoup that financial loss.  Furthermore, it’s time to get a formal custody agreement.  They were unpleasant and impossible to deal with in the best of circumstances.  I can only imagine how ugly things are going to get while this all plays out.  Unfortunately for them, they chose to fuck with the wrong family.  We don’t give up, and we have a lot more influence around town than they seem to think.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part XI

Reunion
Around noon on Wednesday, 48 hours after getting run over and six days after the original “visitation” started, my daughter was reunited with her son.  They were discovered hiding out at the great-grandparents’ house in a small town about 20 miles away.  Once they were located, they were given the opportunity to voluntarily return the baby to my daughter.  The grandfather brought the baby to the local police station, where we met with DHS to make sure that there were no apparent injuries.  Baby is now safe and sound with his mother, who is recovering from her injuries.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part X

Out and Running
Later that day, he was released on bail.  Baby daddy and his parents left town with the baby.  During this process, I specifically told everyone involved that I believed they’d bolt with the baby.  Apparently they didn’t believe me.  The local police department once again proved themselves not up to the task of retrieving my grandson.  They stopped by the trailer, but no cars were there and nobody answered.  We didn’t find this out until my daughter called the police department.  They said “don’t worry, we’ll keep driving by.”  The next morning, she once again called, asking “Where’s my baby!?!”  The police said they didn’t know anything yet, and asked if my daughter knew any other places where they might be.  That’s right; they didn’t do ANY of their own investigating.  They didn’t do ANYTHING to stay in touch with the panicked mother, and they didn’t ask ANY of these basic questions until long after they were ordered to bring my grandson back to his mother.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part IX

Court is Now in Session
The next morning I sprang into action while my daughter stayed home and convalesced.  We were all furious about the whole situation.  I went to the courthouse and talked to the prosecuting attorney, with two goals in mind.  1) See if he could be held without bail.  This wasn’t possible, but based on the entirety of the circumstances, they got the bail upped by 250% over what they usually ask. 2) See if the Criminal No Contact Order (which is automatically issued in the case of Domestic Assault) could be extended to my grandson.  No such luck.  The only method of getting my grandson covered under the no contact order was through civil court.  Fortunately, the court expedites no contact orders, for the safety of the victims.  The court order was issued, and he was served while he was still in jail.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part VIII

Hide and Seek
We got to his parents’ house (sorry, trailer) and knocked on the door.  Nobody answered, but we saw someone open the curtains.  In short, we knew that the baby was in there.  Grandpa was a few houses down, and my daughter saw him.  The cops told him that we were there to retrieve the baby.  He said that the baby “isn’t in there, and you don’t have a warrant, so you can’t go check, so you can just go fuck right off.”  He said some other stuff in a vain attempt to bait me into a confrontation.  In the end, we had to leave without the baby.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part VII

The Baby is WHERE?!?
As my daughter was taken by ambulance to the hospital, baby daddy was taken by squad car to the county jail, where he was charged with Domestic Assault and Assault with Intent.  The police left the baby with his parents.  It took hours for my daughter to even find out where the baby was.  Once she found out, she freaked!  She told the cops to get the baby.  (Remember, the cops were the ones who left the baby with his parents.)  They wouldn’t.  They said to get a court order.  It was too late in the day to get a court order, so the attorney said to call DHS.  DHS said to call the cops.  Several hours later, she was released from the hospital.  I took my daughter to the police station.  Once again, the cops were reluctant to do anything, but I convinced the Lt. to get a couple of cops to go out there with us to retrieve her son.  The understanding was that the cops weren’t going to get involved.  I was just hoping to bluff them into giving him up.  (The part that really angers me about this is that the cops left the baby with his parents, but would do nothing to clean up the mess that they made.)

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part VI

The Deep End
Last Thursday he asked for the baby.  Thursday turned into an overnight visit.  The overnight visit turned into Friday night… and Saturday night… and Sunday night.  He said that he had an attorney’s appointment for Monday to work out a formal custody arrangement, and that she could have the baby then.  There was no such appointment.  My daughter got him to meet at a local restaurant, planning to get the baby back.  Instead of giving the baby back, he tried to take off again.  My daughter called the police, who told her to make him stay put.  Instead of staying, he ran over my daughter with his truck, once again taking the baby with him.  As my daughter lay screaming in the parking lot, he drove back to his parents’ house, like a coward.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part V

Reconcile?
He asked for time with the baby on the 4th of July.  I suspect that he knew my daughter would go along.  During the fireworks, he tried to work things out with her, telling her how much he loved her and missed her.  She wanted nothing to do with this and called me to pick her up.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part IV

Heading South
Roughly six months after the baby was born, it was time for my daughter to move back home.  Baby daddy got fired from his job and couldn’t make rent.  My daughter assumed primary physical custody of the baby, but had every intention of letting baby daddy see his child pretty much at will.  I figured that he’d probably disappear after a couple of months.  This isn’t exactly what happened.  His visits were infrequent and sporadic, but he never went much more than a week without seeing his son.  One day early last month, though, things took another violent turn.  The three of them had a visit and went to the park.  After the visit, they returned home and the trouble began.  He wanted to take the baby overnight.  In normal circumstances – in a normal relationship – this wouldn’t be an issue.  But he had no car and no place to stay.  My daughter said no, pointing out the aforementioned facts as her rationale.  He said that he was going to take the baby to his parents’ house.  (You remember his parents, right?  The bat-shit crazy ones I mentioned a bit ago?)  At this point, I said I wouldn’t allow it, and he literally went nuts.  He got in my face, screaming “You won’t tell me what I can and can’t do with my own son!” He then head-butted me in the face, breaking my nose.  My daughter and he broke up immediately after that.  I’d like to think I helped her realize that it would only be a matter of time before he hurt her or the baby, but I can’t say that for sure.  Either way, they were through.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part III

The Other Grandparents
I have to digress for a moment to talk about the other grandparents.  This may seem a bit of a tangent now, but it will come back into play a bit further into the story.  The only way I can describe them is bat-shit crazy.  They are facing felony burglary charges. Grandma has abused her own son.  Grandpa thinks he’s a lot smarter than he really is.  They’re both pathological liars who seem to actually believe they’re telling the truth.  They’re the epitome of trailer trash.  When my daughter moved back home, crazy grandma told my daughter outright that she was going to take the baby away from my daughter.  They tried to interfere with my daughter’s custody by filing false reports with DHS.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part II

The Brewing Storm
About six months into my daughter’ pregnancy, she decided to move in with him and give things go.  I was reasonably certain that they’d fail, but my daughter was an adult, with a baby on the way.  I wanted to ground her to room, but I really couldn’t.  It’s reasonable for you to wonder how I knew they wouldn’t make it… Well, he couldn’t hold a job, and he couldn’t hold a stable residence.  Even his parents kicked him out.  When they sent him packing, he crashed with a friend, but blew it when they got into a fist fight.  He moved in with a second friend, and proceeded to get booted from that place as well.  The cause?  Another fist fight.  And then there was that nagging suspicion in the back of my mind.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up, Part I

The Back Story
In retrospect, I can probably say that I never liked the guy, but he was dating my daughter, and they eventually had a child together, so I had to give him a fighting chance.  He had a couple of strikes against him coming out of the gate.  (How’s that for mixing my metaphors?)  He met my daughter by crashing a party.  The next morning, things were discovered missing from the house.  He struck me as white trash when we first met.  I accepted that he was dating my daughter though and tried to make the best of it.  I let him into my home.  I fed him.  I gave him money for a motel room when he was kicked out of his parents’ house.  I defended his rights as a father when others were telling my pregnant daughter to go for full custody.  I should have followed my instinct.

Author's Note: You Can’t Make this Sh*t Up is a factual story, broken into twelve installments for easy reading.  I am writing the story primarily for the benefit of my friends... specifically those friends who wanted to know what was going on, but remained silent, allowing me to focus on the emergency at hand.  Thanks to all of you who prayed for us, or sent words of encouragement.  You can go directly to any of these installments by clicking below...

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII
Part VIII
Part IX
Part X
Part XI
Part XII

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Prayers Please

My daughter and her ex-boyfriend have been having custody issues over my grandson.  Last Thursday, the ex-boyfriend took my grandson for a visit.  Since then he has refused to return my grandson to my daughter.  This all came to a head yesterday, when he ran over my daughter with his truck, breaking her foot and wrist.

My grandson still has not been returned to my daughter.  Please pray for us.

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

In Defense of Homophobes



I’m sure that I’m going to get a lot of grief for this, but I’m trying to ask an honest, thought-provoking question here, not merely stir up a hornet’s nest.  How is it that people who support gay marriage, etc. are tolerant, when they refuse to accept that those opposing gay marriage may have a legitimate issue?

Before I continue, I want to clarify, for the record, that I've personally got no problem with gay marriage.  In fact, I'm proud to be from Iowa, one of the first states to allow homosexual nuptials.  I loved it when George Takei came out with his "I'm Takei," and "It's Okay to be Takei" catchphrases, and I free acknowledge that the gay community has far more avant garde taste in virtually everything than my silly redneck self does.  Furthermore, I was, until recently, intolerant of those who were prejudiced against the gay community, having had countless very heated debates with my mother, who opposes gay marriage on religious grounds.

I guess I started having second thoughts when I began to read the occasionally intelligently-written editorial from the other side of the fence.  Let me condense my brain stew of conflicting thoughts... Religion is widely understood to be very important, and something that transcends full understanding, pure logic and strict science.  Faith, specifically Christianity, is deeply ingrained into our national culture.  The Bible outright condemns homosexuality.  So, regardless of how misguided or insensitive the belief may be, conservative Christians have a point of view that should at least be acknowledged.  To belittle or dismiss this point of view does nothing to advance the debate or change anyone's perspective.  All it does is antagonize and cause people to dig in their heels and continue fighting.

To take this issue to the larger picture, I believe that this mentality has a lot to do with what's wrong with our country... I'm right, you're wrong, end of story.  No discussion.  No listening.  No attempting to see the other side of things.  I'm not asking everyone to instantly change their minds regarding homosexual marriage (or any other controversial topic, for that matter).  All I ask is that people quit yelling long enough to hear and understand the other side's point of view.  Who knows?  You might learn something.